Last day being 25 yrs old

(BE WARNED....THIS GETS LONG)

So before this day is over, I wanted to come in here and write. About what exactly, about life. Life is not what I thought it would have been. There's been times when I thought, and trully felt it was better than expected, but then there's been times when it just sucks.

So what can I write for the last day I'll be 25 yrs old. That time, life goes by very quickly. I'm sitting here with so much in my mind, but without words to write. I've had a good life. I've been blessed.

I have to say, it was a great year for me. No longer was I that little girl, I was that woman God had shown me I would be. Still in the making obviously, but it was more vivid. But now I feel lost, if I could think of a word. I'm ending this year unlike any other.

Lord what's going to happen? How will it all play out?

If with years come wisdom, then give it to me Lord. Give me wisdom. I don't want to continue to grow, without really learning, without really growing. Because words come out easy, even actions....but the true self...that's the one I want to grow.

Its been 25 years of pleasing people Lord. Its been 25 years of doing what was expected of me, of what I knew people wanted to see. And along those years, it became who I wanted to be. Lord, let this new year in my life be of pleasing to you.

Gosh, only you truly know my heart, only you truly know everything that is happening around me. Let me stay faithful to you Lord. Not to man, but to you.

Everything changes, I know that better than anybody. But regardless if everything around changes....let me stay true to you. Let me continue wanting to BURN for you Lord. Let me never settle for the smoke. I want be on Fire burning up for you!

Yes, I'm listening to switchfoot. Yes, I'm listening to On Fire and Twenty-Four. But no, its not why I'm writing this. This is my reality.

So for whoever actually read this far. Don't wait for the years to continue passing. What for? live now. Dream and know that those dreams will come to pass.

What do I want for my 26th birthday and for this new year of my life. I want to be closer to my dreams. I want God to use me like no othe time in my life. I want to use everything that I've gone through and am going through, and all the word that God has brought to me and burn people.

And I want to be there for my friends. Because through out these years, that's one thing that I've learned to value and cherish. My Friends. So...Sandra, Thelma, Liliana, Jes, David, Bobby and Gabriel....there's still so much we need to do and for us to be. Let me assure you guys, that you'll always be my gift. (And I can't name every single friend in here....but trust me, if you get lil' messages from me, or little voice mails....I LOVE YA!)

And lil' brother...if you ever read this and actually get this far. I'll always be there for you. Regardless of whatever is happening. You've been one of the greatest gifts my parents could've given me when I turned 17. If it hadn't been for that....I probably wouldn't love you as much as I do.

Okay, this is getting to long now....ok....wow, last post as a 25 year old. Don't take life for granted, don't take anything for granted for that matter. Love God, be passionate about God, and don't forget about the Love and plans He has for you.